In my Cocoon…

I’ve always thought if I played it safe, followed the rules I’d get ahead in life. I wouldn’t be stuck, I wouldn’t feel trapped. I was wrong, I’ve been wrong. That’s not how the real world works.

Yes rules are there for a reason and like everything else if you break the rules you have to face the consequences. To me it feels that I’ve been following the rules and watching the rule breakers soar ahead.

Have you ever had that thought? I have, I’m having it now as I pour my self into this piece. This is not something I’m hearing from a girlfriend whose venting. This is me feeling all these emotions. I’ve worked proved myself and gotten sidelined over and over again. We have this saying ” A Cat and A Dog doesn’t have the same luck” . Ever since I’ve heard that saying I’ve been playing it safe with everything in my life.

I’m not saying that I’m about to go rob a bank. No, I’m thinking that it’s time to take a stand ,whose to say things will end badly? I mean this feeling and these words have been holding me back and like the butterfly it’s time I break out of that cocoon and soar.

It’s scary, it’s nerve-wracking but I will be better off. Safe feels good, being cautious is ok but nothing fun happens there. The people who makes it big didn’t play it safe. Can you imagine Oprah Winfrey playing it safe after being fired? Or Michelle Obama?

As I write , they’re two things I have to do before I close out 2021 and I know once I’ve unlocked that part of my life, nothing I mean nothing is going to hold me back. I have been holding me back. I’m the one who needs to get out of my head. Stop being an overthinker and think positive , I am and I can. Break free from my cocoon.

I’ve made the first step to recovery admitting fault, it’s invigorating and I feel like now I can take on everything. My mind, I’ve been holding me back, thinking I would fail or I will get in trouble.

Greatness is in me and greatness is in you. A friend of mine have been putting off going back to school because like me they’ve convinced themselves that they’re not good enough, I won’t make the qualifying exams to matriculation. Last night, she called me to view her results , she did the exams ,studied applied herself and in the hour of truth couldn’t bring herself to view the results. She called me ,very anxious, nerves all over the place- Dee ,girl what if I failed, it’s been 20 years, I don’t have anymore time, all the excuses you could think of.

I entered her details and when I saw the results ,I paused for a minute. She was still going on and on about how she doesn’t know what she’d do if she’d fail.

Telling her how smart and amazing she was and how proud I was of her calmed her down a bit. Congratulations 👏you’re going to University. Tears of joy, immediately she started speaking positively believing that after 20years she had fulfilled a childhood dream, go to University. Achieving all this especially in a pandemic with a chaotic family life. My friend has broken her cocoon and now she flies ….

Join us and breakfree from your cocoon. Let’s do this thing together.

Feel free, be free …

Until Next Post…

Dee

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Bullet Journaling- What’s that?

Hi friend’s,

The last time we spoke I shared how I’ve started a new hobby. Handlettering is going great I can definitely see progress with my writing I’m more cognizant of upstrokes and downstrokes. I’m even trying to add little doodles to my pieces that I share to Instagram designsbysixty5. I’ve noticed that the more I learn and see the amazing pieces being shared by the many profiles , I have to remind myself that I have to take it slowly and practice overtime my muscle memory will kick in and I will ensure that all my letters are uniformed, my strokes are the right width. Frankly,up to this minute I didn’t know how technical handlettering could be or was. I just saw beautiful words/letters mixed with a little art on paper. News flash it’s none of those things. It takes time, I’ve already gotten supplies as per the many recommendations and I’m currently banning myself from making another brush pen or any handlettering material from Amazon.

It’s like I’m back at school again and I want to get all the cool pens and stationery. I’ve even found myself looking at bullet journals. I already have a planner that I love it’s April I mean the year has pretty much started it’s too late to start another journal. It’s something I’d like to try as soon as Ive learned the mechanics of it. My Kit Life planner has prompts and it’s pretty straightforward so it works.

Do you use a bullet journal? What kind of planner do you use? I have over 6 planner in my Amazon Cart I’m not sure which one to choose as yet. The most expensive is $12 I’m not going any higher than that because I’m not sure if I will go full on with this thing. I’m thinking let it wait out the year until I’ve learned as much as I can about Bujo. I will continue to live vicariously through the accounts I follow on IG and watch on Youtube.

Until next time,

Keep safe!

Dee xoxo

Happy New Year 🎆 🍾 🎊

We’ve made it!

Happy New Year 🎊

Not many people can say that. 🙏 Let’s pause to remember all those who we’ve lost in 2020. We pray and hope their souls are at rest. 🕊️

I’m looking forward to seeing what this year will bring. I have a few goals that I want to achieve this year and I’m looking forward to that.

I want to continue sharing with this medium. I have several plans for this blog and I hope you’ll stick around to see the developments. It’s been great 😊.

Thank you Friends of Deetheory

Thanks for sticking with me in 2020. Almost 3️⃣ months in 100 friends later🎊🎉. Thank you all so much.

Until Next Post,🥂

Dee

20 Lessons- 2020 My Year in Review

2020 has been a rollercoaster year. It was pretty challenging, to say the least, and if I’m being honest I’d say that I’m extremely proud of how resilient I’ve become.

Here are a few things that I learnt in 2020 :

1. You can Do anything You want – I’ve developed this Can Do attitude over the months in  2020, no longer am I shying away from tasks but I’m taking each challenge as we go along. I’ve learnt to do so much in this pandemic. One thing I’ve learnt was that of my nails. I’m enjoying doing my nails at home. I’ve saved a lot and I plan on continuing.

2. Asking for Help – It’s okay to ask for help. It doesn’t mean you’re weak but this proves that while you Can there’s someone out there who can give that added push that you’ll always need.

3. Family is Everything: This pandemic forced a lot of people to find out who their family was. People can now see who they’re married to what kind of children did they bring into the world etc, This pandemic allowed me time to learn certain nuisances about my partner as well as showed me that family is important.

4. I’m not a Patient person: Teachers deserve all the salary that they ask for and then some. I hated zoom classes, yes there were good days but the tedious operation of the zoom classes was just too much. The teachers who conducted the classes have the level of patience that I can only dream of achieving.

5. Being A Stay at Home mom is not something I’d ever want to do. I lift my hats off to every stay at home mom out there. You all are super heroes. The many nuisances that happens with being a stay at home mom I am not built for. Give me the briefcase I’ll bring home the bacon. The tasks are too tedious and cumbersome.

6. It’s Ok to say No. No is not a bad word. Saying No without further elaborations is good.

7. You Need an Outlet – This in the form of friends, a blog, and or a diary. Your mental health is very important and you have to take care of yourself. It’s always good to share with your friends about a problem that you’re having. Built-up anger and all sort of emotions can eat away at your well being.

8. There is no I in Team. I’ve hated working in groups since college. Working in teams has been a challenge and through the year I’ve realized that the saying “The Chain is as strong as it’s the weakest link ” is true.

GroupWork

9. Rest: Rest is very important. Getting 8 hours of sleep does wonders for your body and mental state.

10. Exercise: It’s important to keep active. I haven’t been as active over the months and I’m paying for it. I took for granted moving about climbing stairs or walking to get something at the store for granted. I’ve changed this and going into the new year I want to commit at least 30 minutes a day to some form of exercise.

Rest

11. Saving: I’ve saved a lot and from that habit of saving I was able to take myself out of a few gutters. Thankfully we’ve made it to the 30th day of December. Bill collectors aren’t knocking at my door. It’s important to have a proper budget. See my tips here.

12. Spending time with family and Friends: It took the lockdown to make me realize how much I needed a break just to relax and destress. Take the time you need to relax.

13. Reading: I saw someone share on social media how many books they’ve read in 2019 and I was impressed because that person had a busy schedule ,mom and business and found the time to read. I took the challenge, gave myself 5 books to read. I checked today on GoodReads I have read a total of 15 books in 2020. Reading gives a different perspective on life. It’s also fun.

GoodReads -Deetheory

16. Treat Yourself: You’ve worked hard accomplished a few goals it’s okay to treat yourself to something that you’ve always wanted. It will do you the world of good.

17. Birthdays: Birthdays are very important. This is your day and your day only. Make it special for you. Don’t wait on someone to make it special for you.

18. Work : I love work. At least I have a love hate relationship for work 😆. Who else gets to work from home and calls their boss to let them know that you want to come in an extra day. I love work, I love what I do.

19. I’m Spoilt: I knew this all along 😆. I’m very picky about everything and I’m easily annoyed. I know what I want and if you can’t give it ,I get it myself.

20. It’s Ok to Start Over: Things happened in 2020 that has made me realize that life is not perfect. I’m in control of my destiny. I can always rip the page out start a new chapter and move forward. Yes, human nature will make you feel disappointed but instead of holding onto that feeling give thanks for the experience and the lessons learned. Chances are you’ll never make the same mistakes again. Always have a positive outlook on things.

How was your 2020?

What stood out for you?

Did you learn anything new?

Until Next Post,

Dee

Letting Go – (Blogmas Day 18)

I’ve mentioned my friend Sally* before, we were having a conversation today over coffee. It was good to see her. It’s almost midnight and I’ve realized that I haven’t made a post entry. We’ve got to figure out a blogging schedule going forward.

Letting Go- You will not heal until you’ve let go of what broke you; say that again. Those words came up in our conversation and I thought they were very profound.

Letting Go

Do you find it hard to find closure after a bad break up? Do you still feel that you need to give them a second chance because it was “your” fault why that thing happened and if you just gave them another shot things will get better? Do you still find it hard to hold onto that friendship because you grew up in the same neighborhood went to the same middle school? It could be your job, friendship, relationship whatever it is until you let go and rid yourself of the hurt you will not find peace.

2021 is a few weeks away. Start over, find the peace that you truly deserve. Your happiness means more than anything else. Take that leap and let Let Go, you’d be better off for it.Let Go…

Just saw the beautiful woman on Twitter share how she has left her boyfriend of 8 years 🙌🏿👏 @matthewstam1. I hope they’re other brave men and women like her who chose peace and happiness first. Let Go….

Until Next Post

Dee

Budgeting – 10 Tips to help you in 2021 (Blogmas Day 17)

I’m no finance guru and I won’t say I know everything but I will share with you how I managed to repay most of my debt which allowed me to move into my new apartment and hopefully soon I can say my new home. It’s easy to incur certain costs and even harder to clear up if you’re not as disciplined and intentional . Christmas is next week and I hope that you had a chance to do your Christmas shopping and were able to cop some good deals. Some people had salary cuts and some even lost their jobs. Money is tight and I want us to make the most of what we have. Covid-19 is still around and may be around for awhile so I want you to be prepared going into the new year. I want us all to review our bad money habits and make the best of 2021. I have some personal goals that I want to achieve and so far these tips have worked and I hope they will work for you too.

Let’s put a plan in place:

1. Plan Ahead : I have a pretty good idea of what my income is so it’s easier for me to plan ahead. For the person who may not know exactly what th their income is I would suggest you work with what you have currently. Planning ahead allows you to make better decisions.
2. Budget for the everything : It’s better to account for every area than to be met on with surprises and trust me you won’t like certain surprises especially when it comes to money. Budgeting for everything means you are in control of your money. There are certain things that are fixed and should always be in your budget Mortgage/Rent/Lease, Utilities, Transportation, Groceries, Medical, Savings you get the gist. For things you may not be aware of you can have a category called Miscellaneous.
3. Track your Expenses: Every single dollar counts. Knowing where your money is going helps you to make better decisions. It allows you to put your money where it is supposed to go. If you realize that you’re spending too much money on coffee for example; purchase a bottle of coffee and make your own. Making your own coffee will save you a lot . It’s way cheaper to invest in a coffee maker and get a large bottle of coffee than to hit the coffee shop ten times per day. Think about.
4. Do One Less: Earlier I mentioned coffee and they’re other things that we can do one less of or none at all. I personally had to cut down on the number of subscriptions that I was apart of monthly. Some subscriptions allows you to pause, go on every other month. Whichever you are apart of it is best to cancel or pause. This will allow flexibility with your money.
5. Set Realistic Goals : If you realize that you’re spending way more on groceries than what you actually can afford then you need to revisit your grocery budget. I would also recommend that you buy in bulk and only buy what is needed. Couponing is good, it saves you a lot, I have a friend who is awesome with couponing. She knows where all the sales are and the selected days to visit the various outlets. Doing that allows her flexibility with her money which allows her to do things she likes to do.
6. A budget is not fixed – Make Adjustments: Everything on your budget is not always fixed like the rent/mortgage. Revisit the budget as many times as you want.
7. Budget for Savings: Pay yourself first. There are many formulas out there 50/30/20 rule (applied to your net salary): 50% going to needs 30% wants and 20% savings. This particular formula I am going to try for 2021. As it suggests 50% of your salary should be going towards your needs – needs are things that are necessary for your survival (car payments , rent , mortgage, groceries etc.) 30 % wants – things you spend on that are non essential – subscriptions, date nights, gadgets. 20 % – should be allocated for savings and investments.
8. Budget for Goals – Your goals can be long term or short term. If your plan is to own a home, buy your dream car, take that vacation ; whatever it is this should be apart of your budget. Financial institutions offers clients different ways to reach their goals. It is important to set aside some money monthly, weekly if you can to meet this particular goal. It is advisable to set standing orders for your salary to be transferred into this account. This allows you comfort in knowing that the money is already allocated for and you are not tempted to use it.
9. Reward Yourself : My Grandma has a saying “encouragement sweetens labor” . It’s okay to treat yourself . One coffee at the end of the week is ok, just don’t go overboard.
10. Set Reminders : Reminders helps you to track your progress and figure out if things are going according to plan. The note app on your phone is a good place to set your budget there are also budgeting apps that can assist you along the way. I personally use my notes app as well as I have little stickers around my apartment to help me along the way. I also utilize my calendar app; setting due dates for bills especially helps to prevent late payments which attracts additional fees. Whatever works for you please utilize it, this keeps you grounded ultimately you will realize how much you are saving.

Plan Ahead

I really hope that these tips will help you to manage your money better in 2021 and beyond.

Do you Budget? What are some helpful tips for budgeting beginners? Do you have any particular saving goals?

Let’s Chat.

Until Next Post

Dee…